MelissaEsplin.com

Procrastination & Anxiety

April 26, 2012
Yesterday was all about procrastinating finishing my Project Run & Play entry. I might be getting a little burned out by the competition. Or perhaps my disheveled house is catching up to me. Seriously, I believe I did 10 loads of laundry yesterday. The lighting was just perfect yesterday while I was working on this week's sewing project, I couldn't help but snap a few candids of Felix. He's really starting to move around a lot more. It was a fight to get him to stay in one place, but that's a problem I'm happy to have! He's been practically stationery until this last month. And he's 14 months old. Felix and I are working really hard at getting him up to speed and he's responding really well to the physical therapy. It wears us both out, but it's so exciting to see him growing. I can't help but worry that his delayed physical development is all my fault. I feel a lot of guilt surrounding his growth. I'm sure I'm not the only mother who has anxiety about this. I can't help but asking: Am I playing with him enough? Am I molly-coddling him too much or not enough? Is he getting the right nutrition he needs? Will he be an independent child as he grows older? Are my "extra-curricular" projects holding him back? Or is he just one of those kids who does things on his own timeline? Oh please, God, let it be the latter. I am one lucky mama to have my incredibly sweet, beautiful, healthy children; Penelope and Felix. I really do thank God every day for being blessed with them in our little family. I would be nothing without them.